Many of us have experienced a clash between our Christian faith and contending with unwanted sexual attraction to members of our own sex (gender). We have questions about God’s will for our lives. Questions about God’s love and providence. Questions about whether these homosexual feelings define us. Questions about where we belong. Who will accept us and love us? Who can we trust? Questions about the ability and authority of Scripture to answer our questions.

My prayer for you in the new year? Invite God into the process of sorting out your conflicting feelings of same-sex attraction.

He is not surprised by any of the challenges any of us face. It is my belief that our feelings and experiences of homosexual attractions may have a larger purpose – for some reason known or unknown to you or I. Within my experience, my inability to understand, to explain, or to know forces me to be all the more dependent on the grace of God.

He adores you. He delights in you just as you are, right in this moment of questioning and struggling. I believe God, knowing the number of hairs on our heads, cares about the intricate and intimate details of our lives. He cares about every part of you. And He especially cares about how you see and value yourself.

Your journey with Jesus is a journey to becoming more fully you – authentically you. Go to Him. Let Him in. The harsh realities of life and the trauma of our inner turmoil isn’t pretty. Be honest with Jesus because there’s nothing you can hide from Him. And there’s nothing He want you to hide from Him. We don’t have to go through the confusion, pain, stress and bitterness all alone. Jesus extends to  us compassion, understanding and kindness. He responds to us with grace.

Recently an acquaintance shared the following prayer with me. I think it maybe especially helpful for a Christian teen who is trying to acknowledge the reality of his experience. It can also serve to alleviate some of the weight of shame hanging over him. Please, feel free to use and share this short prayer if you have a desire to do so. . .

“God, you know that I have feelings of sexual desire and attraction for other guys. Heavenly Father, I would like to invite You into my experience. I want to ask You to be with me in what I am experiencing. How would You have me understand these attractions? How would You have me understand myself in light of Your Word?

Please guide me as I search for ways to respond to my feelings of attraction. I do not want to pretend that they aren’t there, and I don’t want to box them up. I want what I feel, my thoughts, my intentions and my actions to glorify You and to be used by You. In the name of the Lord Jesus Christ, I ask for Your guidance and direction.”

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© Darrell Martin and SameSexAttractions.wordpress.com, 2014.

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